I think that deep down in our souls, all of us are probably aware that some kind of mystical evolution is our true task here. But, in my mind, we don’t talk about the mystical experiences we have enough. I suppose we feel it’s a little too “woo-woo.” It definitely grates against a rationalist view… Continue reading something more
Category: Grief
what it will be
Whenever life got hard, Mom would often say, “it will be what it will be.” I assumed that she meant that things would turn out as they should — good or bad — and she would deal with it either way. She never said that things would look up eventually because they always did. Or… Continue reading what it will be
time goes by
This picture was taken the day my mom turned 75. That was seven and a half years ago now. Four years ago this afternoon, we sat together - my mom and dad and sister and I - in a puke-coloured room in the cancer centre as the doctor delivered the news that her cancer had… Continue reading time goes by
on longing
A couple of weeks ago, Richard Gere spent a day just up the street from my City Hall office filming scenes for his new movie called ‘Longing.” It’s an English remake of a critically-acclaimed Israeli film that premiered at the Venice Film Festival in 2017. In it, Gere plays an aging bachelor who discovers that… Continue reading on longing
thanksgiving
It’s overcast at the cottage this morning. It was a spur of the moment decision to come up here late yesterday. One minute we were sitting on the bed folding laundry talking about this year’s brilliant fall colours. Twenty minutes later we were on the road. The last thing I threw in my bag on… Continue reading thanksgiving
the world still to come
TRIGGER WARNING: Overdose, Death A friend of my son’s passed away unexpectedly on the weekend from a drug overdose. The cause of his accidental death is not being said in hushed tones, the way it once would have been. It was shared openly today in his obituary. He was 22. He’d visited our house a… Continue reading the world still to come
about mothers
This is the thing about mothers…. Even as a small child some of us will understand that our mothers have secrets. Longings and hidden sadnesses. Silent sorrows and quiet pains. Some of those things will only ever be told to daughters. And, in that way, we’ll be bound together for eternity by them. Some of… Continue reading about mothers
a brilliant wreckage
I left a brilliant wreckage. A white-hot, smoking tangle of family and love and hopes and forevers – the shatter of which was so great — at least in my mind — that after the words were out, there was no longer any sound. And in the wake of it, I told myself that the… Continue reading a brilliant wreckage
the weight of the world is love
It’s lunchtime and I closed my office door. I feel sad today. Nothing happened to me. I’m blessed in an embarrassment of ways. And yet, some days just seem to sit on top of me like a stone. The world is too much on those days. The multitude of wrongs we do to each other… Continue reading the weight of the world is love
i’m still here
She kneels down next to me and presses her palm to the side of my face. The softness of her. Her hands always so warm. She leans close, pressing her forehead to my cheek. And we stay that way for a minute or two. I’m still here, she says. All you have to do is… Continue reading i’m still here
MeaningMaker 